1. |
maladaptive daydreaming
07:43
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walking past the street, the rain blesses my wandering thoughts
those solitary dawns detaches my lucid dreams from sleep
the spring breeze still carries those fragments of winter
and breaks the barrier to become one within my body
minha visão embaça, com um tipo de lentes novas
que filtram meus olhos pra granular minha perspectiva
essa pressão interna faz tudo parecer tão mais alto
as gotas batendo no chão me engolem como um oceano
eu não pertenço mais a esse corpo
não tem mais nada me prendendo aqui
(flutuando no vazio antes de dormir)
if i'm not grounded i'll just disappear
my rusty wires are starting to lose color again
my self realization isn't pumping my vains
i guess i'll just try living like this
meus olhos se confundem com o ar que eu respiro
a fumaça me enxarca e me faz querer chorar
o céu nunca pareceu tão pesado assim
as nuvens cinzas, minha pele, meu rosto desmanchado
minha carne, minha vida, o meu corpo
nada disso é meu
if i'm not grounded i'll just disappear
my rusty wires are starting to lose color again
floating to the sky, falling in a dream
this never felt so real to me
if i still exist outside of memories
i'll know i'm finally free
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walking past the street, the rain blesses my wandering thoughts
those solitary dawns detaches my lucid dreams from sleep
the spring breeze still carries those fragments of winter
and breaks the barrier to become one within my body
my sight blurs, as some kind of new lens
filter my eyes to granular my perspective
that internal pressure makes everything seems so louder
the raindrops hitting the ground swallow me like an ocean
i don't belong to this body anymore
there's nothing else keeping me here
(floating in emptiness before i go to sleep)
if i'm not grounded i'll just disappear
my rusty wires are starting to lose color again
my self realization isn't pumping my vains
i guess i'll just try living like this
my eyes get mixed up with the air that i breathe
the smoke soak me and makes me wanna cry
the sky never seemed so heavy like this
those grey clouds, my skin, my dismantled face
my flesh, my life, my body
none of that is mine
if i'm not grounded i'll just disappear
my rusty wires are starting to lose color again
floating to the sky, falling in a dream
this never felt so real to me
if i still exist outside of memories
i'll know i'm finally free
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2. |
atrás das cortinas
04:49
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eu vejo as ondas a se formar na minha cabeça
sobem texturas pra me colocar pra dormir
nesse novo mundo vivo tudo por lentes novas
finalmente posso sentir que estou aqui
eu vejo as cortinas da parte de dentro
o vermelho vai se escurecer quando eu brilhar de volta
fui abençoada com a lucidez
da autoconsciência ao traçar meu enredo
é estranho como acreditar que a vida é um filme
no final não passa de um escapismo pra lidar
com o vazio de sentido no real, não me queime
quando o ar que eu respiro for me abraçar
realizo que meus sonhos dão propósito a me perder
em devaneios vivídos, atrás das cortinas vou me esconder
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i see the waves forming on my head
textures float up to put me to sleep
on this new world i live everything through new lens
finally, i can feel i'm here
i see the curtains from the inside
the redness will darken when i shine back
i was blessed with the lucidity
of selfawareness as i draw my plot
it's strange how believing life is a film
in the end is nothing but a escapism to cope
with the emptiness at the real, don't burn me
when the air that i breathe involves me
i realize, my dreams give purpose to lose myself on vivid daydreams
i'll hide behind the curtains
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3. |
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fugindo pra longe de casa, eu quero sentir o meu sangue ferver
não tenho medo da insolação, eu gosto do jeito que o sol queima meu rosto
quando fecho os meus olhos e encaro pra luz que sai no meio do quarto
minhas pálpebras clareiam em rosa ao sentir o calor me envolver
essa semana passou como um devaneio de verão (não quero mais acordar)
não consigo mais dormir, porque encarar o sol parece mais
bonito que me perder em sonhos no escuro
eu não me lembro da última vez que isso me aconteceu
o cheiro de lavanda morna me fez recuperar meus sentidos
é tão estranho sentir que eu ainda existo
o tempo parece parar totalmente nesse espaço onírico
eu só quero estar contigo
não vou mais me sabotar, nem deixar o medo tomar conta
nós também merecemos uma boa lembrança
tirei uma foto mental das flores que nascem na sua boca
pra nunca esquecer que ainda posso sentir alguma coisa
meu corpo é gelado mas eu sei que estou viva
o sangue não mente
quando queima dentro do meu corpo e me faz lembrar
que apesar de tudo ainda estou aqui
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running away from home
i want to feel my blood boiling
i'm not afraid of the insolation
i like the way the sun burns my face
when i close my eyes
and stare at the light that comes from the middle of the room
my eyelids lighten in pink shades
as i feel the heat involving me
this week passed like a summer delusion (i don't wanna wake up anymore)
i can't sleep anymore cause facing at the sun
looks more beautiful than losing myself on dreams in the dark
i can't recall the last time this happened to me
the scent of warm lavender made me recover my senses
it's so strange to feel that i still exist
time seems to stop completely at this dreamlike state
i just want to be with you
i won't sabotage myself nor let the fear take over
we also deserve a good memory
i took a mental picture of the flowers that bloom from your mouth
to never forget that i can still feel something
my body is cold but i know i'm alive
my blood doesn't lie
when it burns inside my body and reminds me
despite everything, i'm still here
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4. |
escamas do mar
05:37
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vem ao cais as ondas devagar
pra mudar o clima do dia
entro nas máguas desse mar
pra nunca mais voltar a minha vida
vou deixar a água me lavar
tanto faz se o sol vai clarear
nunca mais vou ver o céu do dia
deito em paz nas ondas desse mar
pra me levar pra longe da minha vida
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waves slowly crash on the pier
to change the day's weather
i enter the sorrows of this sea
to never again come back to my life
i'll let the water wash me
it doesn't matter if the sun will lighten
i will never see the day's sky again
i lay at peace on the waves of this sea
to take me far away from this life
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5. |
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céu azul, lavandas do mar
deixo o calor me lavar
as ondas queimam o cimento
pra me levar embora
onirismo de verão,
primavera e inverno
vão desbotar as estações
mas o outono
não vai ser o mesmo
quando minha febre baixar
os raios de luz vão me cegar
mesmo enquanto eu olhar pra água
vão refletir de volta do chão
pra inundar minha visão, preencher meus ouvidos de novo
quantas cores podem existir sobre o mesmo céu
e eu nunca pude ver nenhuma delas
mas sinto queimarem o meu corpo
o âmbar borra minha visão, ametistas colam meus pés
meus pulmões se preencheram de topázios, de marinho lazuli
e não consigo mais respirar o ar puro
de azul pra roxo e rosa, de novo
preciso dormir pra acordar amanhã cedo
quando o sol já tiver caído
mas não consigo deitar de novo
e não há remédio que me bote pra ver a minha casa
presa em pesadelos vívidos, de olhos abertos
eu só quero que isso vá embora da minha cabeça
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blue sky, lavenders of the sea
i'll let the heat wash me
thunders burn cement
to take me away
oneirism from summer,
spring and winter
will fade the seasons
but autumn won't be the same
when my fever breaks
sunbeams will blind me
even when i stare at the water
reflecting back from the ground
to flood my sight, fulfilling my ears again
so many colors can exist over the same sky
and i was never able to see none of them
but i feel them burning my body
amber blurs my vision, amethysts ties my feet
my lungs are filled with topaz, navy lazuli
and i can't breath fresh air anymore
from blue to purple, and pink again
i need to sleep to wake up tomorrow morning
when the sun has already fallen
but i'm unable to lay down again
and there's no medicine to put me to see my home
stuck on vivid nightmares, with eyes wide open
i just want this to go away from my head
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6. |
lights out
03:41
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falling through the ceiling i see the tears from her eyes
numbing me down and flooding softly my room
i watched my home falling apart on the night sky
midnight never felt so deep on the gloom
shed the light on me
turn my dream into life
blackout!
lights out! the silence is fragile
dissociating currents deep on my mind
floating to the ceiling, louder than the sky
i don't feel safe anywhere, i'm falling apart
i'm lost, utter and completely lost again
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7. |
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there's a fever numbing my head for so long
tropical delusions of the sun swallowing me
when it's gone i can't say where i lay down
it's okay, tomorrow's gonna be just as warm as today fades into dust
blue sky is clear, the clouds are on the ground
my skin melted when i stared at the sun
the winter heat burnt all of my regrets
nothing's gonna hurt you anymore
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8. |
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te encontrei na praia quando eu ainda tinha uns 8 anos
eu via nós duas tendo férias pela primeira vez
o sol se punha no final da orla
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i found you at the beach when i still was about 8
i saw we both taking a vacation for the first time
the sun was setting at the end of the shore
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9. |
42 wallaby way, sydney
08:12
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sem saber o que fazer pra voltar
a sentir meu corpo respirar
o ar que me preencheu algum dia
sem medo de me afogar
com o peso desse mar
eu quero voltar pra casa
mas não sei se ainda tenho uma
eu to presa no tempo de novo
os dias se misturam uns com os outros
the lights at the way home looked so bright
blinding the windows that kept the warm over me
letting the wind come to wash the night
we saw the full blossom of the evening
fade down the sea
fall back to me
tentando chamar por alguém
minha voz só fica mais baixa
eu sou imaginária, isso não pode ser real
por favor não olhe pra mim
mas reconheça que
eu estou aqui, eu quero existir
em algum lugar
que as cores possam brilhar
sem ter de recorrer
a tons de preto e branco
preciso me manter no chão
mas as vezes só queria
sentir por um minuto
que pertenço ao que me cerca
parte do céu, do mar, das flores do meu jardim, das ondas da minha água
eu quero ser o vento que flutua sobre tudo que me cerca, e algum dia eu vou
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unaware of what to do to come back
to feel my body breathing
the air that filled me one day
unafraid of drowning
with the weight of this sea
i want to go home
but i don't know if i still have one
i'm stuck at time again
the days get mixed with one another
the lights at the way home looked so bright
blinding the windows that kept the warm over me
letting the wind come to wash the night
we saw the full blossom of the evening
fade down the sea
fall back to me
trying to call for someone
my voice just gets quieter
i'm imaginary, this can't be real
please don't look at me
but recognize i'm here
i want to exist
somewhere the colors can shine
without having to resort
to black and white shades
i need to keep myself grounded
but sometimes i just wanted
to feel for one minute
that i belong to my surroundings
part of the sky, the sea, the flowers of my garden, the waves of my water
i want to be the wind that floats above everything that surrounds me
and someday i will
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sonhos tomam conta São Paulo, Brazil
painting dreamscapes
ela dela (she/ they)
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